One of the perks about going to work, as opposed to working alone, is the hilarious things that are discussed around the lunch table. I love this story…
Many years ago at a previous job, my co-workers and I were sitting around the lunch table shooting the breeze and talking about the imminent arrival of our boss. He had been telecommuting to work for a while and decided to actually relocate to town and work in the office. So the discussion had turned to preparing his office for him (someone had thoughtfully painted it bubble gum pink – surprise!).
A sweet and rather innocent co-worker was telling us that since she shared a common wall with our boss’ office, that she thought it would be ‘cute’ to cut out a ‘glory-hole’ in the wall so she could stick her hand through and wave “Hello”.
I think 3 of us almost went into hilarity-induced convulsive seizures – and then laughed even HARDER when it was obvious that she had no idea what a ‘glory-hole’ actually was. She was so confused, along with about 4 other people at the table – you know how it is when you realize you’ve missed the ‘joke’ – there’s a lot of awkward smiling and saying “What? What’s so funny?”
So she was asking “what’s so funny about a glory-hole?” And I asked her what she thought it was. And she said it was a hole in the wall to wave through. I asked her where she learned about glory-holes and she told us that two of her male co-workers at her previous job had told her about them. So I asked her if they were per chance gay. She said, “Yes! How did you know?” – Then the 3 of us, who are obviously knowledgeable about sexually deviant behavior, laughed EVEN HARDER (and I mean the kind of laughter that is completely uncontrollable and tends to cause bladder control issues).
By then she was getting kind of flustered with us – so as soon as I got myself under control, I said that I was pretty sure that her co-workers where having some fun with her and possibly taking advantage of the fact that she was a tad bit gullible. And again she asked “WHAT IS GLORY-HOLE?” I couldn’t actually bring myself to explain it to everyone at the table, so I leaned over and whispered it into her ear. Her face blanched white then turned red. She was completely horrified and utterly embarrassed – she’s a nice Catholic girl, ya know. After the initial embarrassment wore off, she saw the humor in it as well. Of course we never let her live it down (all in good fun). When we meet for lunch occasionally, I always ask if she’s been waving through any glory-holes.
In case you were curious, everything I needed to know about sexually deviant behaviors, I’ve learned from John Waters.
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This type of glory holes are too good. You get the best sex experience with these glory holes.
this was epic and effing hysterical, especially being the good Catholic Boy I am 🙂
I love your blog! Its like your in my head – i mean we see things similar not that there are people living in my head
😀
Hi & thank you – Yes, I think having a Catholic background is germaine to understanding the true horror she felt 🙂 I grew up Catholic – and I’m pretty sure my Mom would be horrified if she read this…
Thanks for reading and glad you like my words – I don’t think I’m short enough to actually reside in anyone’s head ~
Oh god. That is great, but glory holes still give me the creeps. Why would you want to be getting some anonymous action when Bob is the stall over with food poisoning?! Ugh!
I only know about the behaviors, I don’t claim to know WHY anyone would actually participate in them!!! They frighten me….
I hear you! I know about a lot of unexplainable sexual behavior unfortunately. I blame it on the fact that I have a lot of guy friends who love to gross me out.
I know a lot of John Waters’ movies! I do love “The Lifestyle” which is a documentary of swinging in suburbia – it’s like a train wreck.. you want to look away but cannot…
The majority of my friends are guys….so, there you go!
Serious lolz.
Spankies ~
Those also make me lol. 🙂
Indeed
LOL, yeah I do miss lunchtime banter associated with working in an actual office. Oh well, I’ll just live vicariously through the hilarious tales of others!
Sometimes that’s all you can do! Thanks for reading ~ and welcome!
This post made me ROFL. The poor girl. It ain’t pretty when you’re the butt of the joke … See what I did there. I’m leaving now
Butt…hee hee….
I meant anyhoo….
I am a dumba*s too, Ruta. Not sure exactly what a glory hole is but I think I have a good idea or maybe not. Anyhood, a good laugh with friends is ALWAYS a good thing.
I have a link to Glory Hole that will explain all…..
You’re just sweet & innocent!!
Did you ever watch “The Sweetest Thing” where Cameron Diaz gets a black eye from peeking into a glory hole?
Anyway, glory be to hole in the highest.
I really like Cameron Diaz, like Johnny Depp she’s very gorgeous but still plays parts that are not based on being a beauty (Being John Malkovitch) – that makes her very awesome as an actress.
I will have to check it out –
I really wanted to call it Stick Your Head Through The Glory Hole and Say “Hello” – but that hole would be a bit big…
oh that poor woman. This was really funny. (geesh what kind of librarian are you…haaa. I say with an innocent smile)
The knowledgeable kind…well, knowledge of weird stuff…
I was thinking sassy 🙂 but your answer fits as well haa
Wow!! Imagine if she hadn’t mentioned anything and went on telling your boss she built him a glory hole.
That would have been awesome…
YOU NOT NORMAL! (she says with love…)
I know….
I guess this story is just funny to me, eh???
Nah it was actually pretty funny, but it made me think of that song Glory Box and then I thought about that not being a normal train of thought and I remembered the post where I “met” you- the “You Not Normal” one… I just left out those steps from my reply. I NOT NORMAL either, you’re in good company. 🙂
I like the train of thought sequence!
I’m dumb, just a nice Mormon girl. I can use my imagination, though. 🙂
The Wikipedia definition is right at hand (ha ha)…
Not dumb, just innocent ~