International Label Day – The Energy Vampire

Rara has enlightened me that it’s International Label Day 2013. I read about it on my friend, Karen’s Mended Musings site too. The question is – what is your label?

I posted in a comment on Karen’s page that I was a Curious Cat. Which is true. I am.

But even more than that, I think I’m an Energy Vampire.  I keep seeing this page linked on many a Facebook page – with lots of WHOO HOO’s in the comments.

How to interact with the introverted”  – go take a peek – then come back.

I am not so “WHOO HOO” about it.  I get it – I love and have lived with an introvert for over 20 years.  I don’t take issue with that. It’s part of his attraction to me.

I find it offensive that according to Dr. Carmella, there’s something BAD about being an extrovert. As IF people have a choice about their intro/extro-vertedness.  It’s not good nor bad – it just IS.

And as I read along in this tutorial – it’s plain to see that I am the following:

  • I absorb all the ‘good vibes’ from others
  • I need a lot of social interaction
  • I cannot make my own energy
  • I’m a taker of energy
  • I don’t give energy
  • I’m exhausting to be around
  • I’m an obnoxious predator
  • I’m a stealer of sweet, sweet energy
  • Being with me could mean that you’re spending your time on something annoying (read: wasteful)

As an extrovert, I am saddened by this point of view- but I will fully admit that I am an Energy Vampire.

  • I get high from being around you – absorbing your beautiful personality
  • I love being with you – meaningful social interaction helps nourish my soul
  • I am filled with energy and exchange it with yours – because of what you have to offer not what I can steal
  • I can be exhausting; just as exhausting as you can be to others –
  • I can also be uplifting and radiant
  • I can also be quiet and in need of solitude
  • As you, the introvert, needs to be understood – so do I.

I am an Energy Vampire – I am who I am – I love myself as I am. I love you for who you are.  I am not better; you are not better. We just are.

About Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher

I'm a research librarian for Public Television, story teller, bike commuter, baker, music fiend, lover of reading & books, mother, wife, friend - and many more descriptive adjectives and nouns.
This entry was posted in Extroversion, Introversion, Labels, Philosophy, Random Thoughts, Relationships, Society and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

62 Responses to International Label Day – The Energy Vampire

  1. The Hook says:

    I wholeheartedly disagree.
    You give off good vibes! If you suck, I’m sure it’s not on social media.
    Stay positive, my friend.

  2. Aussa Lorens says:

    Haha this was excellent– I am most definitely an introvert but it does get a bit obnoxious to constantly read articles about how to gently treat the introvert and respect their oh-so-adorkable introvertedness. Personally, I think “Energy Vampire” is an excellent label, so props to you.

  3. Jennie Saia says:

    Good for you, Energy Vampire! (That wouldn’t be a half-bad Halloween costume.) That spate of articles about how to treat introverts bothered me as well, and I *am* an introvert. I just don’t think the way to interact with the world is to instruct it on how to treat you with kid gloves. If you want to be part of things, you don’t always get to do it on your terms!

    • I think I’m more bothered by the fact that they made extroverts sound like these horrid people that just bumble thru life sucking the energy that only introverts make. WTF?? AND that extroverts are completely oblivious to how introverts need to be worked with…and they knew exactly how the extroverts are… I know it was meant to be humorous – but it was rather insulting to this extrovert.

      I will be working in my Energy Vampire costume for next Halloween!

      Everyone needs to be flexible, right? It is all about give and take!

  4. Brigitte says:

    I used to think I was an extrovert but I think I’m more of an introvert. In that, I internalize and analyze people, things, situations. I have known Energy Vampires, but I guess we all are depending upon what we need at the time. It’s a give and take I suppose. So, I guess sometimes I is and sometimes I isn’t. 😉

  5. RFL says:

    You have great energy! I can see how these lists would be as annoying to an extrovert as the downside lists to introversion. I think your last sentence says it all though. We are who we are, neither is better or worse. Keep being you, Ruta!

  6. Rohan 7 Things says:

    Yeah, I did find the tutorial a little patronising and snobbish. The point really should be that everyone has different needs that require different responses, there’s no good/bad value system at play. The only thing I’d say is that generally kind people will tend to be attentive to the individuals needs and treat them accordingly and cruel people will treat people as they think they “should” be, not as they are.

    And guess what, we need all kinds of introverted and extroverted folk to make things interesting! In my professional life I’m all singing all dancing, but privately I’m quite introverted 🙂

    Now where did I put that hamster ball…


    • Right? I think we need lots of variety – and people are varied beings like you pointed out.

      What kind of torques me is that the cartoon implies that introverts need to tell us how they are and then tell us how extroverts are – as if extroverts aren’t aware of anything…

      Hamster ball – it’s right behind you 🙂

  7. I’m definitely an introvert, I have to have time on my own to recharge. I’m trying to articulate what I feel about that cartoon, and I’ve typed three different sentences and then deleted them. It’s one o’clock in the morning here, I’m going to just sleep instead…

  8. stephrogers says:

    Yes! There is no good or bad, we just are. I love that. As you’ve no doubt seen I put a selfie up on Rara’s post. I found it quite challenging to wear a label actually. But in the end I decided there’s a power in owning your own identity. Once you claim it and make it yours then the rest of the world can’t use it to put you down any more. It’s the ultimate self defence. That’s why I did it. That and I just love the sense of community you feel when you scroll through all the beautiful pictures.

    • I think we too often confuse ‘label’ with ‘negative’ – I love some of the adjective & nouns people associate with me – and feel that we are all made up of different elements. We can’t help but put names on things – it’s part of makeup as humans; but like you said, it’s how you own it that makes the difference. If someone labels me gossipy, I might need to take a deep look at myself and see if there’s something to that and if there’s room for a little change.

      You are a most fabulous RAINBOW – take that and run with it. It’s just one of the many descriptive ways talk about Stephanie Rogers – I am more than an extrovert as you are more than gay – we are both of us people trying to find a place for ourselves and peace within us. If I’m an obnoxious energy predator, I guess, so be it … those that love me won’t mind and give their energy of their own free will.

  9. Pingback: International Label Day 2013 | Stuphblog

  10. I love that you’re an Energy Vampire, Denise. Yes, let’s embrace who we are. And do we really have a choice about it anyway? I’m a mix between needing alone time and having social interaction. I’ve always been very diplomatic like that. I don’t know how I would label myself then. I could be a Curious Cat, too. They like to be aloof, but also the center of attention. I probably don’t like the center center, don’t mind interacting with the center person. Look how complicated I am!

  11. You know, I think Energy Vampires are not exclusive to extroverts. I would say an Energy Vampire is anyone who frustrates you, and introverts can certainly do that just as well as extroverts. And really, every single person has been an Energy Vampire at some point. I enjoy and am energized by people who are authentic to themselves, but also take interest in me, are considerate of others, have interesting things to say, and make meaningful contributions to the world, however that takes shape. All of these are things both introverts and extroverts are capable of…they just look differently depending on who it is coming from. I think positive energy in any form breeds more positive energy. So Dr. Carmella sounds like a douche to me.

  12. Twindaddy says:

    I love you just as you are, Ladycakes. Don’t ever change.

  13. JackieP says:

    My first husband was a true energy vampire. By this I mean he was a lying, cheating, narc who sucked the life out of everyone he encountered. Not because he was an extrovert, but because he was a narc. You are not a narc and I’ve met a lot of extroverts who I love being with even though I’m an introvert. Like many said before me. Without extroverts many of us introverts would have no one to talk to! People who are like you give us energy and pull us along in life. I have done some adventurous things because my friends were extroverts and haven’t regretted a thing! Well, I regret my first husband, but that’s different. I love extroverts because they are easy to talk to and they are fun!

    • Yay! We all have something to give – and your first husband was a jerk because he was one, like you said – independent of the intro/extro -vertedness. I have learned so much from all the people in my life that I have loved – and I tend not to think of them in terms of intro/extro – but I do find introverted men rather sexy (yes, dear husband, you)….it’s that attraction to something that is not myself.

      Thanks for your comments! And I’m glad you have gotten away from your first husband – it sucks (vampire pun intended) that we are taken in by bad people at times. But the lessons learned are truly learned, right?

  14. Pingback: International Label Day 2013 | rarasaur

  15. Carrie Rubin says:

    As an introvert, believe me when I say most of us LOVE you extroverts. You provide much of the excitement to our worlds. In fact, I envy those who can waltz through a room of people and own it. Rather than steal our energy, I think you help fuel it. Sure, after a night of socializing, I’m spent and drained, but that’s because I used up my own energy. If not for the extroverts helping me along, I would have puttered out before I entered the room!

    The world needs all kinds of people (well, except maybe serial killers…). Otherwise how boring would it be?

    • Exactly! We all are good contrasts – introverts help to ground me and all good people give off good energy.

      I am not an extreme extrovert and I can go either way after an evening out – either I’m exhausted or I’m fueled.

      I think that two extroverts together might be a lot of frenzy and too introverts a lot of quite – it’s nice to mix it up. I know several extroverts that are with introverts b/c it works well.


      • Carrie Rubin says:

        And people often make the assumption that introverts don’t like to talk. That’s not true. We generally shun small talk, and most don’t like speaking in large groups, but get us one-on-one on a topic that interests us, and we’ll talk your ear off. As my husband can attest…

  16. jmlindy422 says:

    I saw that comic and thought, “That’s a crock of crap.” I’m an introvert, but I don’t go around in a protective bubble. Unless staying home rather than going out to the movies, dinner, gallery openings, etc. counts as a hamster bubble. Hm…gonna say “no, ’cause my protective bubble doesn’t move.” Seriously, I am an introvert and being around others exhausts me but not because they are sucking away my energy. It just doesn’t make me more energetic. My sister is the opposite. She LOVES going out. She’s out almost every night of the week and one weekends. It would make me crazy. When we are together, I don’t feel like she’s sucking anything out of me nor I out of her. Of course, I can be brave about this because I’m sitting in my comfy hamster ball, uh, I mean, house.

    • I’m glad I’m not the only one that thought this was maybe not the only way to look at things! I couldn’t go out every night of the week – that’s exhausting to me as well – but I hope that I am not perceived as sucking energy but more like I’m absorbing the energy that’s being given.

      Thanks for your comment!

  17. Karen says:

    I read “How to interact with the introverted” too and even though I consider myself to be mostly introverted, I found some of it insulting. I NEED extroverts in my life. I crave them. If I didn’t have people like you around, I’d be a self-contained ball of nothing but me and I’d go nuts. In my experience, the extroverts who “take” my energy are the ones who don’t pay attention to social cues that tell them they’ve lost their audience. Most extroverts I know (like you) are very in tune to the people they interact with. There’s a give and take that just doesn’t happen between most introverts. Those are the ones I’m drawn to.

    • I think you’re absolutely right – we connect with certain people, regardless of the fact that the are on the spectrum of intro to extro (b/c it’s not really all or nothing – but a gradation of our relation to the world), and those people nourish us – I’d go crazy without people and I too like to be alone at times. I think there are unaware people all over the spectrum. And i don’t enjoy those people’s attentions as much either – b/c even extroverts have social cues.

  18. El Guapo says:

    Other than “ruggedly handsome” or “functionally insane”, I find labels don’t really apply to me…

  19. I like the label Energy Vampire! Cute! I did the label thing too over at my blog. I love how Rara inspires us all! ♥

  20. Cathy Ulrich says:

    Interesting take on the whole subject of introversion/extroversion, Denise. I think that being an energy vampire is an entirely different subject than the way someone moves through the world. Either can be an energy vampire, depending on their behavior and their neediness. I think an energy vampire is someone who takes exclusively and doesn’t give back in any way regardless of whether they feel comfortable interacting with the world or not.

  21. janet says:

    I woke up thinking of you today and how much I missed your “energy”!!! I love you for who you are too!!!

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