And the LIE is…

Ok people ~ as I write this, only one person  (El Guapo) has correctly guessed my lie and one person  (Karen*) sorta guessed it.  I guess I’m better at it than I gave myself credit for…

1) I had a very short stint in a sorority – very short…because really – I don’t belong in a sorority…or near a sorority… LIE! LIE! LIE! LIE! LIE! LIE! I was NEVER in a sorority, not even a dorm room.. No way, no how, never … 

2) I am a belly dancer – I started at age 19 because I read Tom Robbins “Skinny Legs and All” and I wanted to brave something by myself for the first time ever. I totally have the belly and hips to pull it off.  Totally true ~ all of it… I have big hips and not a flat belly…I love belly dancing. 

3) I was a gymnast when I was younger and could do an aerial (no-handed) cartwheel on the balance beam.   Then I hit puberty…no one wants a gymnast with breasts and hips…sad but true. Yup – I am a bendy gal  – I also have wonky hips and that pretty much put the kibosh on my career.  I actually don’t really like the sport because I don’t like the culture of the people – it’s very mean and petty in my opinion. If I could do it all over again, I’d be a hockey player. I had switched to figure skater for a brief period until we move to Arizona. 

4) My favorite movie is John Waters’ Hairspray – and I got to meet someone that was in the movie as he works in public television at WETA in DC…I made him sign my HairsprayDVD.   TRUE! All of it! I was thrilled when I found out my friend John was in Hairspray as a dancer in the Madison. WHOO HOO!!

5) My cousin won several million dollars in the NY state lottery – I hope he remembers me in his will…  Yup – this is true. Lucky bastard.

6) I dropped out of college for a semester to attend bar-tending school – despite the fact that I am allergic to alcohol and cannot stay up past 9PM.  Yup – True as well. I liked catering and it was fun working at those gigs. I also worked in my brother-in-law’s brew pub as the lunch bar-tender. It’s kind of sad to see people totally trashed before noon on a regular basis. But overall, I didn’t like tending bar too much  – tequila makes me very ill, well, all alcohol makes me ill.   Beer, wine, grain alcohol – all of it. I can’t even drink girly drinks or spike my coffee.

And there you have it!


*Karen  – it’s ok that you didn’t guess it since we were estranged during our university years…

About Rutabaga the Mercenary Researcher

I'm a research librarian for Public Television, story teller, bike commuter, baker, music fiend, lover of reading & books, mother, wife, friend - and many more descriptive adjectives and nouns.
This entry was posted in Blogging, Games, Humor, Lying, Random Thoughts, Writing and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

38 Responses to And the LIE is…

  1. The Hook says:

    You’re full of surprises, aren’t you?

  2. Okay, so I was wrong , you are good, Denise. If you would have said you joined the sorority, I would not have fallen for that. Tricky!

  3. Represent, Ladycakes! I too belly dance. I haven’t been doing it for nearly as long as you have, but I definitely have the hips and belly for it. And I freaking love the music. I am not, however, bendy. At all. Not even a little.

  4. stephrogers says:

    I loved Skinny Legs too! What a great read. But…what’s a sorority?

  5. Shannon says:

    I love your little lie! Totally me right now. Everybody I know practically encourages me to join one and I just snicker in response. I thought your lie was about your cousin, because I was hoping that he or she shared some of the fortune with you and you were able to broadcast so on an earlier post. (: But, then again, that’s family business.

  6. Carrie Rubin says:

    I seem to be really bad at guessing the lies. I almost chose #1 because there’s no way I would’ve ever been in a sorority, and it seemed to me you’d be the same way, but I caved and went for something more obvious. Figures. 🙂

  7. Karen says:

    The more I thought about it the more I knew it was #1. I’m surprised I remember anything from those years!

  8. Lauren Johnson says:

    So interesting! This was fun! Do another 😉

  9. Well, I am learning stuff… like, you are a good liar…

  10. You are getting better at the lies… I would have guessed 5. Lucky bastard, indeed!!

  11. rossmurray1 says:

    I think we’re going to need photographic / video evidence of the belly dancing before we take you at your word.

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